Paint descriptions have reached a level of pretentious ridiculousness, it seems that everyone wants to use a color that their friends and peers have never used before, let alone heard of, this is evident in colors like Elephant's Breath, which sounds like a parody but is in fact a real paint.
It might be great fodder to impress your buddies with at all those drinks parties and baby showers you attend, something you think will elevate your status (how wrong you all are), but as such they're ripe for someone like Jeff Wysaski (aka Obvious Plant) to come along and add some hilarious new descriptions and names.
Wysaski is an old pro at this type of prank, previously creating fake self-help books and planting them in book stores, and fake descriptions for pets at his local store.
Now he's turned to paints and his descriptions are just as inspired as his other pranks.
They include purple becoming "Barney's Blood", light yellow becomes "Blond, James Blond" and perhaps my favorite of all is black, which is given them much more amusing name of "The Eternal Darkness That Will One Day Consume Us All."
With names like that, it could certainly spice up a prosaic Sunday trip to the hardware store.
Check out the full list below and try to remember, "IT'S LIGHT GREEN GARY!'