Best Obituary Ever? Father Reveals He's Spider-Man In Touching & Humorous Self-Penned Obit

At 35 years old Aaron Joseph Purmort lost his year-long battle with brain cancer and died on 25th November 2014. But before he went he'd penned his own humorous and moving obituary that blurred fact and fiction. In it he revealed that he was actually Spider-Man, that he'd once been married to pop queen Gwen Stefani, and that he'd been in a band called The Asparagus Children (great band name btw).

Aaron was a married father of one and soon after he was diagnosed with a brain tumor his wife, Nora, started a blog to record their time together. On 30th November she shared the obituary on the blog, with the following statement: "Before Purmort died, we had time to sit down and write his obituary. I’ve never laughed and cried more in one sitting, but I’m so glad we got to do this. I love this man so damn much." You can read it below.

Purmort, Aaron Joseph age 35, died peacefully at home on November 25 after complications from a radioactive spider bite that led to years of crime-fighting and a years long battle with a nefarious criminal named Cancer, who has plagued our society for far too long. Civilians will recognize him best as Spider-Man, and thank him for his many years of service protecting our city.

His family knew him only as a kind and mild-mannered Art Director, a designer of websites and t-shirts, and concert posters who always had the right cardigan and the right thing to say (even if it was wildly inappropriate). Aaron was known for his long, entertaining stories, which he loved to repeat often.

In high school, he was in the band The Asparagus Children, which reached critical acclaim in the northern suburbs. As an adult, he graduated from the College of Visual Arts (which also died an untimely death recently) and worked in several agencies around Minneapolis, settling in as an Interactive Associate Creative Director at Colle + McVoy. Aaron was a comic book aficionado, a pop-culture encyclopedia and always the most fun person at any party.

He is survived by his parents Bill and Kim Kuhlmeyer, father Mark Purmort (Patricia, Autumn, Aly), sisters Erika and Nicole, first wife Gwen Stefani, current wife Nora and their son Ralph, who will grow up to avenge his father's untimely death.

A service will be held on December 3, 2014 at Shelter Studios, 721 Harding St. NE, Mpls 55413 at 6 pm.

His wife also shared photos of their time together on Instagram.

And at the top of this post you can find a teaser trailer for an upcoming documentary about Aaron and Nora, showing how he faced his illness with such good humor and grace.

A crowdfunding page has also been set up to help support his family and pay for medical costs.

The night we met, Aaron slid on his knees across a dance floor to deliver two beers to @lillyj3 and me. I laughed so hard I could barely breathe. On our first date, he grabbed my hand and dragged me to the dance floor during the Mayer Hawthorne show at The Varsity. As a gangly Caucasian girl, being forced to dance in public is basically a form of assault, but he made me laugh, spun me in circles and under his arm, and I didn't care if anyone was looking at me. Do you understand what I'm saying? He made me literally DANCE LIKE NOBODY WAS WATCHING. He was a living, breathing decorative sign from TJ Maxx. This photo is from Lil and Alex's wedding, when we took turns wearing #ralphiegrams in the Ergobaby and burned up the dance floor all night long (10:30 PM). It's perfect. Thank you for capturing this, Justine. And thank you Aaron for making me dance.

Sweet @r3dh3n and Leah made some amazing pieces of art--I mean cookies--for our family. #stillkickinthis

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