When you're ten years into a marriage, being lazy lovers is pretty standard practice. Passions have dwindled, commitments have increased, all you want to do after a hard day's work is go to bed. But it's not always the healthiest thing to do if you want to keep your marriage, well, a marriage. But how do you change things?
Well, help is at hand in the form of a device called the auto-thrusting hydraulic girdle. Yes it sounds ridiculous, but yes it might also help if you and your partner have become lazy lovers. Trouble is it's also entirely fictional.
Because it's actually a made up device from online comedians The Kloons' latest sketch video. It's titled Lazy Lovers just so we all know who it's aimed at, and takes the form of a mock informercial (mockformercial?).
Anyway, it's for lovers who still want to make the beast with two backs, but are just too damn tired to get it on.
How Can This Device Help Lazy Lovers?
So, instead of putting the work in yourself, you and your partner, lazy lovers that you are, can strap in and let the auto-thrusting hydraulic girdle do the rest. It also means that you can get on with some other tasks while the girdle does the business. It's the perfect addition to your multi-tasking abilities in the modern world.
"With customizable settings, you and your partner can set the speed, depth, and angle of each thrust." notes the video. "And with the jackhammer settings, no matter how lifeless you're feeling, you can still take your lover to the limit." Sounds perfect, right? It even comes with a neck brace to avoid whiplash. And it's also dishwasher safe (even though it's to big to fit in your dishwasher), so it's easy to clean after use.
And if you did fancy livening things up after too many months wearing the girdle, you could always try another idea from The Kloons, their cunnilingus app, Lickster. Welcome to the future of modern day relationships.
Check out more from The Kloons at their YouTube page.