Some murders take mere minutes, but not the one that occurs in the horror short The Horribly Slow Murderer with the Extremely Inefficient Weapon. The film was released online back in 2009 and since then has enjoyed a vast following and cult status.
Once you watch the ten minute trailer (yes, that's right, it's just a trailer. The film is over 9 hours long) which is full of knowing winks to horror movie tropes, it's not hard to see why. It follows a man called Jack who's plagued by a hooded figure, the immortal Ginosaji, a figure who attempts to murder him over a period of years and years with... a spoon.
It's quite possibly the slowest murder ever undertaken in film and, although a spoon doesn't sound that terrifying, that's probably because you've never been hounded by a relentless demon constantly attacking you with one for a decade.
The film is by Richard Gale and it's worth posting now because Gale has a new project coming up, a feature length version of the short which will reveal the origins of Ginosaji and why he's attacking Jack.
Gale says on his website that a Kickstarter campaign will be announced soon giving fans the chance to become involved in the project.
You can check out the director below valiantly enduring a spoon attack from Ginosaji as research for the new project. Be afraid. You'll never look at a spoon in the same way again.