The iWatch... I mean Apple Watch, gets a note perfect parody by Jack Douglass who strives to understand just what the heck is the point of many of the features, and why anyone really needs it. No one asked for it, but Apple gave us it anyway.
Never before has the world had a phone where you can share your heartbeat, struggle to look at pictures because of the tiny screen or send terrible animated emoji. But Apple have made it so, and will be charging you $349 for the privilege. Hooray!
And to punish you even further, they give you the new U2 album. Thanks Apple. Thanks. Check out the official Apple Watch promotional video, below. Where Jonathan Ive's oh-so-earnest reverential utterings about the wearable device makes the video sound like a parody itself.